I decided to make this blog. To stay strong, to look back on and see my progress and to keep inspired to STAY THIN. Thin is beautiful. Who would love someone like me, with love handles, belly rolls, a massive ass and flabby thighs that wobble when she walks? Double chins, 'tuckshop lady' arms, chubby cheeks?
No one.
Thin is what we aim for. And I WILL get there.
I am 63 kilograms today.
I am aiming for 45 kilos.
My goal is to have a flat, sexy stomach, thighs that don't wobble when I run, a thinner, prettier face, NO LOVE HANDLES, NO BELLY ROLLS! Ribs visible, collarbone defined, nice ass and thin arms.
Today I ran for an hour and went on the exercise bike for 5 mins beforehand as a warm up. The exercise bike burned 50 calories, I don't know how much the run took off but I was a kilo lighter when I got home.
When I run, I can feel the tingle as the fat in my legs, ass, face, arms, belly melts, trickles, tickles its way out of me. I can FEEL it disappearing. It is an amazing feeling.
I also cut 3 times today, on my left hip. I was feeling a bit out of control, because mum had just made me a massive dinner that I had to eat, and I needed to feel like I was back in control, and to make the shame and guilt ease a bit, I cut. I love the blood, it makes me feel better. Seeing those red droplets just make everything seem like it will turn out okay.
I'm working on this! I'm 100% vegitarian now, (a great excuse for eating celery, cucumber and lettuce) which will hopefully help my body shed the thick yellow layer of FAT that surrounds it. I NEED to be able to see my ribs again.
:) Staying strong.
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