disillusioned.

don't go making promises that you can't/won't/don't keep

i wantg to find something meaningful to put here so that when i die you can read this and find something you can understand, something you can relate to

it's not as easy as it sounds

i havent taken my tablets in weeks, i havent had sheets on my bed in months, i havent gone for a walk or played with the dog or
lived.

i dont even ENJOY my horse anymore

i cried today
i burst into tears 3 times in study
for nothing
just thinking about why it is that i was sad
and it overwhelmed me

life hurts me

i dont want to live anymore

please please please
i dont know who i am begging to
i doint even know what it is im begging for